There’s this group of mums and dads, this group of whanau who have LGBTQ kids and they’re meeting tomorrow night.  I’m not the group joining kind of person, but I really want to go.  

I wrote to Rainbow Youth and asked them if they knew of anyone who provided training or information for primary schools regarding transgender students.  I told them about our family, and about Izzy, and about how supportive people have been and how fortunate we feel for that.  But I told them, there’s something missing, I’ve got this need that’s growing stronger.  It’s the need to connect with other families like ours.  I need to hear and see, and be heard and seen, by people like us.

On one hand I feel like this need is a betrayal of all those who are walking alongside us, it’s like I’m saying they’re not enough – my friends, family, community, and that makes me feel…well… not good.  But on the other hand this need is so strong, there must be a good reason for it?

So, I got an email back with a link to this lady who runs a group.  The support group for whanau of LGBTQ parents (Is there a particular order for those letters, because I’d be more inclined to list them alphabetically BGLTQ, but don’t want to rock the boat :?).  So, rather eagerly, I checked it out. There was a photo of the lady, she looks nice. I read through a few of her blog posts, it all sounded ok and hmmmm, their next meeting is tomorrow night.  So I emailed her last night, told her very briefly about Izzy and asked if there were any parents with young transgender kids in her support group going yo the meeting.

I just read her reply.  No, they’ve not got any families of kids as young as Izzy, but I should come.  There’s a bunch of young adults coming to speak about their experiences as young LGBTQ people.  It starts at 630, on the other side of town.  I really want to go.  I think I will.  We’ll see.



  1. You should go! What a great support it could turn out to be. Completely understandable that you would want to connect to families on a similar journey. I dont think any of your friends or family would see that as you thinking we arent supporting you enough (i certainly dont!) x

    Liked by 1 person

      • Glad to hear that. Once people know who you and izzy are, it’s very hard to regain your privacy. Especially when people think they can use izzy as some kind of “proof” of their own legitimacy


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